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Do you ever go through the day and wonder why the hell you even woak up? It's hardly noon, and already everything seems to be going wrong.

1) My back is killing me today. It's mostly the middle left side, and sitting seems to aggrivate it more than anything. It's been hurting for a few days now, and I think it comes from the fact that I have been doing squats without a belt. Although, who knows. I've actually only done them once in the last month or so.

2) My tv remote is on the fritz. I push and push and push the buttons and more and more, nothing happens. It still works some of the time, but that isn't really good enough since the power button on my tv is broke and I can't turn the thing off w/o the remote. I should probably get a new one.

3) My computer has been shutting off on me a lot lately, and I suspect it is due to overheating. I can understand if it happens whem I'm playing games and stuff, but when it happened 3 times on me this morning, I was simply trying to transfer some things from a CD to itunes. It did it the other day when I was watching a video file on youtube. It's probably that damn Windows that is causing the problem, and I really need to do something else. I even shelled out 20 bucks for a cooling pad to no avail.

4) My cell phone keeps turning off automatically. It works just fine, but if I keep it closed for a long, overnight for example, the thing just shuts-off. I don't know what the deal is with that.

5) In attempting to go to the gym this morning, I had to come back inside 3 times after leaving. The first time, I forgot my water bottle. The second time, I forgot something that I needed to take out to my car. The third time, I forgot my ipod. This third time, however, I got my ipod, but set my water bottle on the table only to realize once I had gotten to the gym that I actually left it on the table.

I should just call this day a wash and go to bed right now haha.

So, my time here in Farmington is about to come to an end, and on Sunday, I have to head back to Albuquerque. Honestly? I don't really want to go. I've had such a great time here this last week, the first time in a real long time that I can truthfully say that I did. I went out with friends (plural) that I haven't seen in a long time, I went and visited a few of my teachers from high school, and I've just generally felt very good. I wish I could carry the momentum with me back to Albuquerque, but honestly, I don't think I can. The friends that I actually like, are here, and socially, all that is waiting for me in Albuquerque is somebody who I find both depressing and often
irritating as well.

But, for as good a time as I've had, I do need to go back. In the first place, I need to re-gain control of what I eat because here, I've just been eating non-stop. A lot of it has been the bad bad sugar devil, also. I guess it is physchological, because I don't eat nearly the way I do when I'm away from "home" as I do when I'm here. There's also the fact that I cook and buy my own food. I also need to get back to the gym. I haven't gone in two weeks. Given this, though, it is possible that my weight will actually be down since I haven't been lifting. But that's not really the way I want to lose it.

I know that I need to make some major life changes. I want this to be a "Summer of George" type of thing, but there are waaaaaaaaaay too many things that need to be changed to lay out here. I'll probably lay them out in the next few entries.

It seems that people aren't reading the civic space as much anymore and since this seems to be the "it" place on this site, I'll probably start posting my blog entries at both sites. Anyway, here is what I wrote:

I took my last final in Modern Political Theory yesterday afternoon, and now my semester is done. I start my summer class in the beginning of June, so I have a few weeks of nothing before I hit the grind again. The day before (Tuesday), I also turned in my other consistant headache, my Las Vegas city project, so I was glad to get that out of the way as well. It was funny though, I was in the econ building before my final Wed., and I was chatting a bit with my professor for the city project class and she said that my work for that class was really, really good. She mentioned something about me submitting if for an undergraduate research thingy next fall since I wasn't graduating. She was a little coy on the details, since we both had places to be, but she said to go and talk to her this summer when I go and pick up my project. That was the second professor this semester who has told me that my work was really good. Personally, I always think my work is crap, but I guess my anal retentive nature pays off every now and then huh? I think those two professors are pretty safe bets as far as reccomendation letters for grad school ya think?

Speaking of which, the cat is pretty much out of the bag as far as my plans after I graduate in December. I've tried to be sort of secretive about it because I didn't think my parents would be totally keen on the idea of me going to graduate school to get a Ph.d in a field that they don't find terribly useful (political science). I was essentially right. Although my dad didn't totally besmirch the idea, his enthusaism didn't exactly blow me away. You know what though? I've spent way too much time putting too much stock into what other people think, especially people who don't know anything about what I'm talking about. I really do think that this is what's best for me, and to be perfectly honest, at this point, I can't imagine what else I would be good at. Of course, it's a very long road, and it is very possible that something will come along that will make me change my mind again, but it can be really, really hard to come to a conclusion about anything when you get absolutely no validation from the people around you what-so-ever. I'm sure if I were to ask my professors about it, they would probably think it was a good idea, and me going to work on Wall St. (kinda what my dad wants) sucks! haha