So here's my week in review.

I went to a doctor monday and went over my ailments there, mainly with the nurse... but the doctor and I went over my constant tiredness issues and insomnia and he prescribed me ambien. I feel kind of special that i got a drug prescripition... but we didn't really get to go over the headaches, my bum wrist and the chest pains too well.  I had to get blood work done the next morning. Had to fast the night before... which sucks because half of my insomnia is from waking up hungry at night.

Oh and my friend called me out to go see the Resident Evil movie that night. It sucked.

But besides that he talked with me(or at me) about his girlfriend issues, family issues and that he's moving back into town. I really love him discussing his issue with girlfriend dedicating herself to him while trying to balance a life at college... I don't understand his complaints and all it serves is to make me feel angry at myself for still being single and alone at my age and I'd love to be in his position GF wise... 

That next morning was really hard... can't eat before they take your blood and I have to hold in my pee since they need that too. Thankfully it didn't take too long...

So a few hours after that I go to my horse class and get to pick up poo and throw hay bales.

I didn't start the ambien until that night. So I seemed to sleep well from it.  

Wednesday I got my car inspection done. That's always an uncomfortable chore to do in the respect that i have to wait around in the tiny waiting room with strange people for an hour. I brought my DS with and played that even though I felt self-conscious doing it around strangers. I was to get out of there when it done.

Then things started happening where i was feeling angsty and depressed. I was still feeling pissed about monday night and I start dwelling on my accursed singlehood. Not a good thing.

Thursday i didn't want to go to class, but I went away. I was still feeling down. That day we did some more grooming practice, I did tail washing... feed the horses hay nuggets and not a whole lot else.  Well I did feel better for a bit after that...

But the rest of day I got depressed again. It was maddening. I hate being single and keep feeling jealous and stuck. I despise myself and I suck, blah, blah, blah...

Only thing I could do the past few days to get my mind off it was to engross myself back into my writing again.

So I didn't take the ambien last night on the off chance that maybe it was making me more susceptible to depression. Of course I hardly got any sleep and was bleary eyed most of the day.

But I haven't felt too bad today...

However, I have to work long hours again tomorrow and I have to sleep. So I'm going to try this again and see what happens. 

Oh and my blood testing says I'm fine in that regard. I was really hoping there was going to be something weird... but, no... nothing interesting ever happens to me...