I understand. Sometimes I fight to get up out of the bed because I am depressed from being about friendless and lonely. Don't beat yourself up there are a lot of ppl out there with this u r not alone. I have come along way with my s.a.  Futher that I ever knew possible!!  I felt the same way when i was seeing a psychologist.  Believe they do undersatnd the mental impact.  Don't be ashamed u deserve to live like everyone else and live you life with friends. I am one of the many ppl on this site who would love to be your friend. If I lived close to you I would be there for you as a friend even if u said nothing and did nothing. :) U must realize that there is more to your life that s.a. and unexpected, wonderful things can happen if u open up a little bit at a time at your pace and u need support.  I spent nearly ten years afraid to leave my house just to go to the store.  I could not speak nor look ppl in the eyes. Now, I can do all of that. I don't have anxiety when I leave my apartment either and I can stare ppl int eh eyes and well as having a conversation. so believe me when I say I had all the problems one could have. I had a chemical imbalance and angoraphobia. I had been literally through flaming hell. I have had a lot of therapy so I think differently and that really helps! I have gotten all these bad illusions out of my head regaring s.a.d  i think differently now and that has most definately changed my perspectives, my world.  I still have s.a but not nearly as bad. I can go out now and feel like a human being and just smile. Take very small steps and get the support so u can stay motivated to continue to change the way you perceive the world.  I do hope this helps. You have to let allow yourself to be liked. u deserve it and ur worth it..  your friend kitkat :)