Really. Is there any point to trying to find a relationship with someone who can understand and accept my anxiety? Or to put it even more bluntly: Is there any point in wanting a woman to love me? I try to meet people online, every now and then someone writes back regularly and gives me hope that maybe at least I've made a friend. Only to have that hope smashed, and it happenes over and over and over and over and over...... Anyone with the IQ of a potato would have given up by now. Not me. I keep trying, and keep getting hurt, and it's really all just futile. I'm just not meant to be happy, that's all. But I keep trying because I'm stupid. It's almost like I'm being punished for something I did in a past life. Like Sisyphus, except at least HE knew what he had done wrong and that he was being punished. But my life is just my life, and there are no answers, there is nothing profound or meaningful in my suffering, and the only question is: Why do I go on? I don't know, I reallydon't.
