i hate this. i hate when i get so down. i lose all hope, and want to kill myself. i feel as if it's impossible for me to think positive. i don't think i'll ever enjoy life. i ######## hate this feeling of worthlessness and self-loathing. why can't it just go away for good? i'm getting sick and tired of it. i try to talk about it, but that only helps temporarily. i just want to die. i'm so ######## pathetic. if i only felt no pain, that's the part i fear about dying. and thats whats kept me from killing myself i think. i feel retarded writing this piece of poo blog.
